“40 Days of Community”, 3 of 7
“KEYS TO BELONGING”
James 4:1-8
Rev. Dr. Kirk A. McCormick
October 19, 2008


          That song, “I Never Lost My Praise”, was great, well done! I was gone all week of course at a conference but then I came back to about a dozen phone calls from people who are really struggling and actually I think that song speaks so well as to why we’re here as a church. To encourage one another and to remind each other that even when we’re down there is still hope and we can still praise the Lord, so thank you for that song.

          Open in your Bibles today to James chapter four, as always we encourage you to use the outline provided in the bulletin just to take notes. We’re in the middle of our “40 Days of Community” series and as you open your Bibles let me just say a word of where I was last week. I usually don’t say too much, but I was at a conference of about two hundred pastors and elders of our denomination who are fighting the good fight to keep the denomination in an orthodox position as people from the left are trying to move us to a place that is unbiblical and that does not honor the Lord. So about two hundred of us gathered together, ironically at my old church in Southern California, so for me it was a bit of a home coming. They just, last weekend, dedicated a new building that actually was the result of my suggestion fifteen years ago. It took them a lot longer to build theirs than it’s taking us to build ours, but it’s a beautiful youth facility and fellowship area. The key was being there. You know you sometimes think, like the prophets used to think, God, am I the only one who’s out here fighting this fight. You know in your mind you’re not but to connect with other people who have the same kind of passion it was good in most ways. A little discouraging in a couple of other ways but by and large it was good.

          We’re in the middle of this series and it’s pointing us to the truth that God has a mission for us. That no matter where we are as Christians we are truly on a mission and that mission is what we call, from Jesus’ teaching, the great commission, where we are to be about making disciples. We cannot make disciples if we’re not out in the world encouraging people to come to faith in Jesus Christ. Certainly as a church that’s a challenge for us. Maybe other churches have a more natural feel for that than we do because we haven’t been taught well or maybe we haven’t stretched those kinds of spiritual muscles. But this is where we’re going, making disciples of all the nations and helping people to say yes to Jesus Christ. Overall the Scriptures talk about various priorities for us as we’re in the midst of this great commission and today we’re talking about “we are better together when we are together” given the fact that we belong to each other and we belong to the Lord. We’re better together when we’re in fellowship. You might think to yourself “What does being in fellowship have to do with the great commission?” Well imagine if you were out there on your own, not knowing you have the support of fellow Christians here behind you. Or imagine not having a place where you could go and be trained at a deeper level, to know how better to reach out to people in the name of Jesus. Imagine that, none of us would do real well if we were totally on our own all the time. So we come together for many reasons to honor the Lord in our worship and then to grow in our faith together and also to support one another. And the Bible calls all of that fellowship.

          James chapter four talks about how sometimes the church gets off a little bit, gets off that path. So let me read for you out of James 4, starting in verse 1, I’m just going to read through the first part of verse eight. I’d like for you to read the rest of the chapter and even chapter five today or sometime this week as part of your own readings because it all had to do with the same idea that we are created for fellowship so how do we honor the Lord by being in fellowship? I apologize, I have a very sore throat this morning, I don’t know why, so if I sound a little funny I apologize. James 4:1-8, Those conflicts and disputes among you, where do they come from? Do they not come from your cravings that are at war within you? You want something and do not have it; so you commit murder. And you covet something and cannot obtain it; so you engage in disputes and conflicts. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, in order to spend what you get on your pleasures. Adulterers! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. (you say “What does this have to do with fellowship?" It has everything with fellowship because so many Christians are trying to live with one foot in the church and one foot in the world and it just doesn’t work) Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God or do you suppose that it is for nothing that the scripture says, ‘God yearns jealously for the spirit that he has made to dwell in us’? But he gives all the more grace; therefore it says, ‘God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.’ Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Please read the rest of this chapter and chapter five later today.

          Let’s pray together: God we’re so grateful that we need not ever lose hope or confidence or praise, even when we’re experiencing difficulties in life, because Lord Jesus you are more than sufficient for our every need. You provide so much that we cannot enumerate them all but we know most of all Holy Spirit you are here even now supporting us, encouraging us, and inspiring us to be the people that you created us to be. We lose our way every so often and we come back for correction and then to a better place all because of your grace. So we thank you this morning and pray simply that you would teach us what we need to hear. As you do we will praise you all the more for you are a great God and we are here to serve you. Holy Spirit speak to us in such a way that when we leave this place we’ll know we’ve heard not just from a man but from you the Lord God Almighty. We ask this is Jesus’ name, Amen.

          So when you think of the word fellowship what comes to mind? We were talking the other day at our men’s group and one of the men of the group said someone from another church asked him “So where do you fellowship?” Our guy said “I’ve never really heard that expression very much.” When you think of the word fellowship what comes to mind? I think it’s a much better way of saying what God intends when we say to someone “where do you fellowship” versus “where do you go to church”? Think about that, it’s a much better way of expressing what God desires for us in the church, in our fellowship. When you think of the word fellowship what comes to mind? Maybe brunch after church, is that fellowship? Cookies between services, is that fellowship or is that just necessity? Life in small groups, is that fellowship, or time alone with God in prayer, is that fellowship? Attending a concert or activity, is that fellowship? Is gossiping about church people around the water cooler, is that fellowship? Fellowship, what is it? Well the biblical word for fellowship is simple, when it was used in the secular world it meant something in common with someone else. When it came to being used in the church context it really means community. That we share a common sense of who we are and a common purpose and so we are a fellowship, we are in community with each other participating in the works of God. If you look through the Scriptures you’ll see various things or ideas about what fellowship is but if you look on the practical level it seems like there are four levels, if you will, of fellowship.

          Now I have to pause for just a moment. When I was leaving last week I gave our front office ladies, Ronda and Jessie, my outline for today which is what you have. But I’ve actually changed some of it. I knew I was going to be away so it’s changed a little bit so just kind of go with me here, okay? Four levels of fellowship that as we progress in our commitment to the Lord and to the church we get deeper into what God wants for us in fellowship. The first level, the most cursory or superficial level, of fellowship is membership. It’s at the membership level where we connect with one another. Where we identify with a particular body and we say “I want to be a part of that family”. So we make a choice to belong and to identify ourselves with a church and in that way we become a more formal, if you will, part of the fellowship. That’s what God’s will is for us, that none of us would be out there alone. We do not neglect the gathering of one another as it says in the book of Hebrews but rather we come together so that we can encourage each other all the more as we see the day of Jesus’ return coming. So membership, it’s important, it’s exactly what God wants us to be. As Rick Warren says in his “Purpose Driven Life” book, God doesn’t want any Christian to be an orphan. He wants us to belong to a family somewhere. So we say ‘yes’ to the Lord first by joining a church, by connecting with a church in a particular way. That’s why it’s important for those of you who have yet to connect in this kind of way with our church, if we are your home church become a member. Not so we can say we have “X” amount of members, I could care less about that, but so that you can honor the Lord in your commitment to him in this place and take that step of responsibility, if you will, that spiritual step of commitment before the Lord. We have a new member’s class coming up November 2nd. That’s just the very primary level, the most superficial level; it’s the beginning level of fellowship.

          The second level is what I call friendship. The friendship level, where in membership we are just connecting people in the church or with a particular church, but at that friendship level we begin to share life with other people. Now you can be a member of a church and never get to this level sadly and often people try and they sometimes succeed if that’s consider success. At this friendship level we begin to share life with others. Sometimes we share life through a small group so it’s at a more intense level; it’s at a more committed level. Sometimes it’s sort of informal where we just see the same people in the coffee fellowship time and we’re eating our cookies and catching up on “how did your week go?” Still it’s all part of sharing life and it represents a deeper level of understanding and experience in fellowship. I would tell you that this in my mind is one of the key steps for any new member, for anyone who is a member of a church. We know if we can get people into a small group then the probability of them moving on to the third and fourth levels is far greater than if people just stay at the “membership” level. So I’m hoping that today, if you’re hearing me, if you’re listening to what the Lord is saying, that you’ll say “You know I want to belong at a deeper level”. Well, then, move from being a member into being in this friendship category at least where you’re joining a small group and sharing life at a much more intimate and intentional level.

          Now the third level of fellowship is what I call partnership. You can write these down; they are not in the bulletin today. Partnership, at this level we begin to invest in the church. We’re not just connecting, we’re not just sharing together, now we’re starting to give back, we’re starting to invest in the church. So you will hear us very often say “Where is your niche or what is is your niche? What is your area of service in the church?” Are you only taking or are you now returning some capital, if you will, some resource to the church so the church can be more broad in it’s outreach to the community and to each other, investing. In a couple of weeks, when we focus on service as part of our “40 Days of Community” you’ll hear of some multiple mission opportunities or service opportunities. We’re really excited, we’re a part of the Boca Helping Hands food kitchen where in the past we’ve taken the fifth Saturday of the month (if there is a fifth Saturday) and said we’ll handle that for them. Well, now we’re stepping that up one level and we’re going to say we will take one Saturday a month. So you’re going to be hearing of opportunities where you, as part of your small group perhaps, or just a group of people coming together for that particular day. You can serve the Lord by engaging in this activity, by investing in the mission of the church. Well, if you do or do other things like gleaning, or whatever the other opportunities are, you are becoming a partner and that is so much more gratifying than just being on the outside level looking in.

          Now the fourth level is what I call ownership. You’re not just investing in the church; at the ownership level you are shaping the church. Isn’t that exciting? We have a lot of shapers in our church. You know Bob and I get a lot of the credit. At my old church this last weekend people were coming up to me saying “Good job”, as if I really had anything to do with their new building. My former boss came up to me and said “Thanks a lot for saying it and then leaving. Starting this thing and then taking off.” I said to him, “This is just like it was when I was here. I get too much of the blame and not enough of the credit from you.” Well in the church, our church at least, I think sometimes we as pastors get too much of the credit and too much of the blame. Because really we have leaders in our church, and you’re seeing more and more of them, who have ownership of what we are doing here. They’re not just investing; they are shaping the future of our church. You’ve heard about the outreach strategy, you’ve heard a little bit about it, you’re going to have an opportunity to hear more. This is truly, completely, led by those who are the owners in our church not just the Elders or Deacons, even though that’s who kind of started this whole thing.

          You have an opportunity to shape the church to become an owner. We know that, even with all the sub-prime issues that we’ve been talking about that ownership is not necessarily good when it comes to home ownership if you can’t afford it; it’s so not true in the church. In the church ownership is always the best. That fellowship level of being a true owner is always where God wants us to be, where we’re shaping the ministry and life of the church. You don’t have to do that as an Elder or a Deacon. Imagine the lives that are being shaped right now over in the Sunday School classrooms or over in the teen center. You know we’re still looking for people who will come along side our teen ministry to help Louis to shape those teens. We recently had a couple of people and we’re very grateful for that but we still need more. Imagine being able to shape the life of a young person to where they then go one to become the person God wants them to be. I’m grateful for those people in my past aren’t you? Well these are the levels of fellowship that God has presented to us. we all probably started at that membership level but are we satisfied with being a part but kind of looking from the outside in or would you not think it would be much more gratifying in our hearts if we get all the way down to that ownership level.

          Well how do we do that? How do we go from being on the outside to being kind of the heart of the matter? How can each of us work toward ownership if that’s where we sense God is moving us. I encourage you to sense that today. Let me give you five quick keys to building the fellowship of the church, to becoming like an owner or to building our fellowship together. The first key is self-understanding. Let me say right away that these five keys are not the only keys to doing this, but these are five suggestions to you on how to start. The key to building the fellowship or becoming an owner in the church is self-understanding. James 4:1 says, “Those conflicts and disputes among you, where do they come from? Do they not come from your cravings that are at war within you?” Evidently there were people in the church of Jerusalem who were bickering and fighting and trying to take things from others and what’s that from? It’s just from “I don’t understand who God created me to be.” Not one who takes but one who truly invests and gives and then starts to shape the lives of others in the name of Jesus. Self-understanding is important to fellowship because a healthier ‘me’ makes for a better healthier ‘we’. Truly, the healthier and stronger and more mature each of us are as individuals the healthier and stronger and more mature our church will be, simple logic. So be honest with yourself, how are you doing in the Lord, do you understand your weaknesses and your strengths, the gifts that God’s given you to use in ministry? Are you willing to go to the Lord and say “What ever you want I’ll do”? “Am I here God, am I simply a member, can I get to become an owner?” Self-understanding, the more we know about ourselves the more we present to the Lord because we’re honest the healthier we will become.

          The second key is submission to God. It’s important to fellowship because it teaches us priorities; God first and then everyone and everything else. James says it very simply as he’s challenging the people of the Jerusalem church, “Submit yourselves therefore to God.” You know, in the world, some of us are really important. Some of you are very impressive, well actually all of you are, I love you all equally of course, but you know what I’m saying. Some of you are very impressive in the world, you’re a CEO a CFO, you’re a professor, you’re a whatever. You’ve raised fifteen children who are all godly people, that’s impressive in our day and age. Some of you got a great education, have a great pedigree, you’re socially in good standing, and so on and so forth. Can I ask you this one thing? How impressed is God with that? Or, is God impressed with those who say ‘yes’ to him whatever the case may be? I had a fellow in my youth staff out in California, his name was Barry. Barry was a pastor at the third largest Calvary Chapel in the country. He and I became friends and I was the head or our youth department and I just felt like the Lord was saying it was time to ask Barry to be our Junior High Director. Now to put that in the equivalent terms it would be like going from being a vice-president of Disney to selling popcorn on the street kind of thing at Disney World. It was a big step down but when I asked Barry he said, “You know I thought that was what the Lord was going to say through you” and Barry came on my staff. He used to say to me because I would marvel at him, he was a little older than me and a super gifted guy. I would marvel at his willingness to submit to the Lord’s will in his life and he said, “You know what Kirk? To be a good general you have to be a better private.” That’s submission, “God, whatever you want me to do I’ll just do it.” Some of us fight God; some of us resist what the Lord wants us to do. Can I encourage you today that part of being a part of the body before the Lord is just saying “Whatever God you want me to do I’ll do it.” It’s a key to the building of our church together. I love the fact that some of our leaders who are high-powered whatever in the world are willing to do whatever it takes in the church including setting up chairs or tearing them down, all for the sake of what God is doing. I love that!

          A third key is spiritual discernment. I think I told the story once before of a group of elderly ladies who were driving down the highway and a state trooper sitting on the side of the road waiting for a speeder. He clocked them on this major highway going 22 miles an hour. He didn’t see who was inside so he thought these people are either drunk or they’re looking for trouble. He went out and pulled them over, went up to the car, and here are these five sweet, dear, elderly women. The driver was just all smiles and the three ladies in the back just totally gripping on, totally distraught and the lady in the front passed out. the trooper said, “How are you all doing?” She said, “Just fine officer, is anything the problem?” He said, “Well I stopped you because of the speed you were traveling.” She said, “Well I was just doing the speed limit.” The officer said, “No you weren’t you were going way under the speed limit.” “Well, what’s the speed limit?” “Well, its seventy miles and hour.” She said, “Well that sign there says it’s twenty-two.” “No Ma’am, that’s the route number.” “Oh, I’m so sorry I misunderstood the signs.” “Well, just know you can drive that fast; by the way is everyone in here okay?” She said, “Yeah, we’re alright.” He said, “Well, how come these ladies in the back look so like distraught?” “Oh, they’ll recover soon; we just got off route 99.” Have you ever noticed how easy it is to miss the signs of life, to misunderstand them? To kind of not get the point when God says “Hey, I want this” and we go “What?” Spiritual discernment, it’s something that God asks us to seek. James talks about it like this: “Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and God will draw near to you.” Be discerning in your walk in life for not every sign we see comes from the Lord even though it may look enticing. But sometimes the very signs that we want to miss are the ones that are coming from God. I know I’m going to use that big “C” word, I know change is hard. But what do the signs say? Are the signs telling you today that God wants you, God is speaking to your heart right now, that God wants you to make a commitment to Jesus maybe for the first time? Or recommitments to the Lord or this whole thing of you know “I’m just kind of sitting on the outside of church, I’m a member but I know God wants me to move deeper.” Be spiritually discerning and that will enhance your own life as well as our fellowship.

          The fourth key to building the church and to building the fellowship of the church is to speak well about others. This lady is walking down the street on her way to the super market. She walks by this one house, a new family lives at this house, and this young boy is sitting on the porch. She looks at him at waves and says “Hello” and he goes “Hey lady, you’re really ugly!” She’s kind of startled and she keeps on walking and thought “What in the world is that all about?” She’s walking home and sees the same little obnoxious kid sitting on the porch. She waves but doesn’t say anything this time, “Hey lady, you’re really ugly!” Well, she thinks maybe he’s having a bad day. She goes home and a couple of days later she walks back to the store, “Hey lady, you’re really ugly!” Now she’s getting a little angry, who is this rude kid? The parents must be equally rude. On her way back from the store “Hey lady, you’re really ugly!” Well, that’s enough, she thinks, and she walks up to the door and knocks on the door. The father comes out and she says “You have the rudest child out here. Every time I walk by he yells ‘Hey lady, you’re really ugly!’” The dad is totally embarrassed so he says “I’ll handle it, I’m so sorry.” “Okay fine, it will never happen again?” “It will never happen again.” “Your child will never yell at me again, ‘Hey lady, you’re ugly’?” “Never again I promise or I’ll take him out to the woodshed.” So the lady leaves the father yanks the little kid inside and says, “Don’t you ever say ‘Hey lady, you’re really ugly’ to that lady again.” “Okay, I understand.” “Do you understand me? I don’t want you to ever be so rude again.” “I understand.” “Don’t you ever say ‘Hey lady, you’re really ugly’ to that lady again.” “I got it Dad, not a problem. Next day, lady is walking by, she looks up at the little boy, “Hey lady”, and she says “Yes”. He says, “Well, you know.” Speaking well to and of others is important to fellowship because it shows love. I don’t like to talk about love that much, quite honestly, because it’s such an overused word. And yet the Scriptures define God as love. That maybe just my own personal issue that I’m dealing with, but I have to tell you that to speak well of others demonstrates godliness. It demonstrates an intimacy with the father that others don’t have. You hear someone speaking poorly of another that means they’re not close to God. If you hear people gossiping or slandering others, especially others within their own church family, they are not close to God. God wants us to speak well of others, to be kind as we talk about each other, as we talk to someone to their face. James 4:11, if you were to read on in James chapter four says, “Do not speak evil against one another, brothers and sisters.” Don’t speak evil. The opposite is true; speak well and in that way we build up the fellowship of the church.

          Key number five, surrender your will to God. It’s a lot like submission but it’s a bit different. Submission means placing yourself under the authority of God. It’s sometimes means, there’s an implication there, that we may not agree with it but I’m just going to just do it. Surrendering your will is the next step. It is more than just reluctant obedience. It’s a desire to be in the very will of God no matter what that will might be. Surrendering our will to God is important to fellowship because it keeps everyone of us looking to the Lord for his will as opposed to our own. So if you were to continue to read in James chapter four in verse 10 it says, “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.” Just surrender before the Lord and he will lift you up at the right time. I like what C.S. Lewis says, “There are two kinds of people; those who say to God ‘Thy will be done’, and those to whom God says ‘Alright then have it your own way.’” I want to be one of those people who says “Thy will be done. I don’t understand fully why you ask me to do certain things, but I want to do it. I’m going to do it because it’s from you.” I’m not going to be so concerned about what I want even though we all want certain things in our fellowship, in our life outside of the church, in our families, whatever. We have personal desires and that’s okay as long as those are underneath the will of God. I’m hoping you’ll join me today in saying “God, not my will but your will be done.”

          Now here’s where I would have gone on to tell you four actions steps to take if you want to build a fellowship. I’m going to mention them very fast just so you can fill in your outline. I’m not going to spend very much time on them because I inserted that part about the four levels of fellowship at the beginning, enough said. Action step number one is to pray for others. In the book of James later on in chapter 5:16, “Therefore confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The prayer of the righteous is powerful and effecting.” Pray for others, in praying for others you want the best from God for them. The key characteristic there is sympathy; I feel what you’re going through so I’m going to pray for you.

          Action step number two is to forgive others. Colossians 3:13, “Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you…” Yes absolutely! If I expect God to forgive me then other people have the right to expect me to forgive them. It’s not easy but we work toward that. The key characteristic there is humility. If we’re humble enough before God we’ll be willing to forgive others and that is hard sometimes I know. But if we’re interested, if we’re really committed to, building up the fellowship we’ll forgive others.

          Number three, be an ambassador within the church. I laugh because sometimes I hear “You know I go to church and no one ever says anything to me. No one ever greets me.” Well, do you greet other people? “Well, no, I kind of expect them to come to me.” Listen if each of us were an ambassador when we go out to fellowship, when we come into the sanctuary, when we’re in the community and see a person from our church, if we were just to reach out to them and just say “Hi, how are you doing? ” it would make a difference. Paul puts it like this in three different times in the Scriptures, in Romans, I Corinthians and 2 Corinthians Paul says, “Greet one another with a holy kiss.” Now I’m not encouraging you to kiss one another per-se, if you like that go for it. But greet one another; go out of your way to be an ambassador to other people. Especially if you see some one out here who may be new, they may have been here for fifteen years; you just don’t know them yet. But if you don’t know them go over and just say, “Hello, my name is ____, welcome or I’m glad to meet you.” Because I’ll guarantee that more times than it’s someone out there who is looking for someone to come to them because they’re too shy or they’re new maybe. The key characteristic here is friendliness.

          Now last by not least is lend a hand wherever you can. Paul says in Philippians 2:4 “Look out for one another’s interests, not just for your own.” Its self explanatory isn’t it? The key characteristic here is helpfulness. I want to be helpful to you to what the Lord is doing; I’m just going to lend a hand. It doesn’t matter what my degree is or what my pedigree is, whatever, I’m just going to do it.

Let me close with a little story. I love this story because it has so much to do with fellowship. A lady, this little elderly lady, always goes to the same post office, the same teller all the time. It’s hard for her because she has really bad arthritis but she’s standing in line one day and the fellow behind her said, “What are you here for?” “I just need to get some stamps.” “Well, Ma’am if you go over to that machine you can put your money in and get your stamps out.” She said, “I know I can get stamps there but that machine can’t ask me how my arthritis is.” Now that’s why we’re in fellowship. So we can ask each other “How is it?” Support each other, “How are you doing?” in that way we fulfill the will of God in our midst.

          Think about it, let’s pray together: God how grateful we are that we can be in fellowship with one another but first and foremost with you. You call us to love each other, we try, not always perfectly but we try. You call us to support one another and we try but we can maybe do better. Most of all you call us to grow in our commitment to what you’re doing here so we will try. We will bless you Lord and as we see what you are doing we will try best to chime in, to be a partner with you in what you’re doing. But more importantly Lord, today I pray you would encourage your people sitting here to have that sense of ownership. To work at shaping the future of this church as we say yes to your will. Bless us as we now go out and fellowship with each other and as we do we will praise you, we will honor you and we look forward to meeting new friends today. In your name we do pray, amen.







Updated Saturday, November 1, 2008

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